Friday the 13th: The Final Chapter
Not only does Friday the 13th mark the day Donald Trump descended upon the UK, it’s also Jason Vorhees’ birthday (not sure how that works). So let’s raise a glass […]
Author Archives: Dan Meier
Skyscraper
More a one-man movie industry than an actor, Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson has wrestled the disaster flick from Roland Emmerich’s clammy hands. Barely has the dust settled on his last […]
Alice, Sweet Alice
A withdrawn 12-year-old (Paula Sheppard) becomes the prime suspect when her younger sister (Brooke Shields) is murdered during her first communion, in Alice, Sweet Alice – AKA Communion, Holy Terror and Feather Ded. OK I […]
The First Purge
I should start by saying I’ve not seen the other Purge movies, having always found the premise profoundly stupid. Why would any government make all crime legal for one night […]
The Long Goodbye
The Long Goodbye is a 1973 noir based on a Raymond Chandler novel, as opposed to The Long Kiss Goodnight, which isn’t. This beautiful blend of cats, smoking and topless yoga is […]
Hudson Hawk
Bruce Willis and an undercover nun (Andie MacDowell) undertake a wacky adventure in a film they should have called Old Habits Die Hard. Instead they called this 1991 flop Hudson Hawk, […]
Get Carter
Get Carter is not to be confused with Coach Carter, John Carter or the 2000 remake starring Sylvester Stallone, to whom the film’s misogynistic violence probably came quite naturally. Allegedly. Like […]
Hereditary
Be wary of horror films claiming to be the scariest thing since sentient bread. Usually when critics make those kinds of claims they’re only comparing them to those Conjuring movies, which […]
Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom
For all its stupidity, 2015’s Jurassic World was probably the best film about a dinosaur since The Iron Lady. Like the original Jurassic Park it combined our love of dinosaurs, theme parks and asexual reproduction. […]
The Tale of the Princess Kaguya
Isao Takahata’s swansong is based on The Tale of the Bamboo Cutter, believed to be the oldest Japanese narrative in existence. The tale of a tiny princess discovered inside a bamboo shoot […]
Screen Goblin 