Friday the 13th Parts 1-3
Having rewatched the first three Friday the 13th films on the eponymous, inauspicious occasion, here is another stab at reviewing these classic slashers (and Friday the 13th Part 3). Friday […]
The Creator
In 2055, the USA has rejected AI after it nuked Los Angeles. But the state of New Asia has embraced it, turning even its mountain dwelling peasants and monks into […]
The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn – Part 1
This review is the result of completing a Twilight marathon, which is a lot like competing in a real marathon except it’s much more important to drink. My focus is […]
Saw X
What do the Saw franchise and Cheryl Cole’s career have in common? They both should have ended after that toilet attack 20 years ago. Saw X takes place between Saw and Saw […]
The Equalizer 3
Everyone’s favourite maths-based vigilante (with the possible exception of John Matrix) is back in this anticlimactic threequalizer. For the final chapter, Bob (Denzel Washington) has quit his job as an […]
Cobweb
A boy (Woody Norman) hears a knock on his bedroom wall in this horror flick called Cobweb, because The Knocking was already taken and sounds stupid. In a particularly stale […]
The Blackening
Bodies Bodies Bodies meets Bitch Ass in this horror/comedy about the most racist board game since Trump: The Game. The Blackening looks designed to skewer black representation in the horror […]
The Nun II: Back in the Habit
Valak the demon nun is back to wreak Mass boredom on a French monastery in this Holy Seequel to The Nun; putting the con in convent since 2018. I haven’t […]
Day of the Dead
The lunatics have taken over the underground research facility in this plague-fuelled military satire they should have called Dr. Strain-Love or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love Our […]
FrightFest 2023: Departing Seniors
Days before graduation, a set of high school bullies are given a bloody send-off by a masked killer in indie slasher Departing Seniors; a punny title likely lost on British […]
Screen Goblin 