The Pope lies dead. Cardinals assemble to jostle for his vacant slot without appearing to want it too much, like strategically shuffling towards the exit twenty minutes before the end of your child’s school play.

The papal plot struggles with predictability and proposterousness, with twists so absurd they wouldn’t seem out of place in a Tory leadership contest. But tour du force performances from the likes of Ralph Fiennes, Stanley Tucci and John Lithgow are permanently gripping, creating an atmosphere of intrigue and ambition that you could cut with a giant pair of glittery papal scissors.

Procedurally it feels well researched, and painstakingly replicated, so its less plausible moments don’t dampen the sense that we are seeing behind the curtain on this mysterious tradition. Except when the cardinals complete their voting slips in biro.

It’s bolstered by sumptuous cinematography worthy of a St Swithin’s Day feast for the eyes. Fans of 2022’s The Two Popes will be delighted to see an equally impressive reconstruction of the Vatican’s private parts. We’ve come a long way since the ugly CGI recreations of Angels and Demons. A full scale Sistine Chapel is complimented by vast marble halls, stone steps and watery fountains all of which look totally real.

Consistently enthralling, moderately thought-provoking and pleasingly daft, the red smoke is puffing out: Conclave gets my vote.