Café Society
The problem with having a birthday at the beginning of September is that there are never any films out. My only option was Woody Allen‘s Café Society, which failed to […]
Category Archives: New Releases
Ben-Hur (2016)
This is a CGI-heavy retelling of the classic tale, in which Ben-Hur (first name Judah) takes on the Roman Empire and his estranged brother Messala (first name Chicken Tikka) to try […]
Nerve
Nerve is a teen techno-thriller from the directors of Paranormal Activity 3 and 4, which I didn’t even realise had directors. Based on Jeanne Ryan’s novel, the film revolves around an app […]
Lights Out
In 2013, David F. Sandberg made a terrifying short film (below) with zero scope for expansion. Enter James Wan. Lights Out opens in a mannequin warehouse, for no reason other than it’s […]
David Brent: Life on the Road
A pathetic middle aged man tries to revive his career as an entertainer by dusting off David Brent, the character that first made him famous. Fifteen years on from The […]
The Shallows
The release of new shark movie The Shallows coincides with today’s discovery of 400-year-old sharks, believed to be the world’s oldest vertebrate animals – a bit like when The Martian was released the same […]
Suicide Squad
In the latest entry into the DCEU, a government operative (Viola Davis) rounds up a team of supervillains to save the world. What could possibly go wrong? Everything. Suicide Squad is such a mess […]
Born to be Blue
A few months ago, Don Cheadle played Miles Davis in jazz caper Miles Ahead. Now, Ethan Hawke plays Chet Baker in a similarly improvisational (and druggy) take on the jazz trumpeter’s […]
Jason Bourne
Matt Damon is Bourne again in this fourth or fifth instalment, depending on whether you remember The Bourne Legacy, starring Jeremy Renner. Some legacy. Jason Bourne’s story was resolved at the […]
The BFG
Steven Spielberg’s adaptation of the Roald Dahl book follows orphan Sophie (Ruby Barnhill) as she befriends a Big Friendly Giant (Mark Rylance) – even though his name is tautological, the stupid […]
Screen Goblin 