Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves
Kevin Costner, megastar of the nineties but latter-day nonentity, is hopelessly miscast as the tight-clad outlaw of Sherwood Forest. When away on the crusades his father (Brian Blessed) is murdered […]
Tag Archives: action
Bullitt
Bullitt is an early example of the great tradition of giving your main character an exciting-sounding-if-preposterous last name so you can use it as the title of the film. In […]
The Magnificent Seven
The latest product of a Hollywood executive’s brainstorming session entitled “What haven’t we remade yet?” is a rerun of classic Western The Magnificent Seven, about a gang of, you guessed […]
Superman
With the world still struggling to come to terms with just how bad Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice is, we thought it would be a good idea to look back at […]
Ben-Hur (2016)
This is a CGI-heavy retelling of the classic tale, in which Ben-Hur (first name Judah) takes on the Roman Empire and his estranged brother Messala (first name Chicken Tikka) to try […]
The Punisher
After watching The Punisher, I was astonished to read that it was made in 2004. This is, in part, due to the fact most of the action is done in camera: […]
Star Trek Beyond
Star Trek Beyond is the latest instalment of the revamped sci fi series, presumably because this is the point where it’s gone beyond a joke. However, anyone wondering why the […]
Swordfish
Swordfish is a 2001 action movie starring Hugh Jackman (young), Halle Berry (topless) and John Travolta (awful). Jackman pretends to be a computer hacker named Stanley Jobson, who must work for a deranged terrorist […]
Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice
Billing itself as the “gladiator match of the century”, Batman (Ben Affleck) takes on Superman (Henry Cavill) to see if either of them can convince fans to part with their cash. Who […]
Top of the Flops 4: R.I.P.D.
The Rest in Peace Department is responsible for hunting down dead souls that refuse to leave the mortal realm. It’s staffed by dead cops from a range of times and […]
Screen Goblin 