A gang of criminals and corrupt cops plan a violent heist in this macho thriller. And when I say macho, I do of course mean moronic.

John Hillcoat’s latest movie has a big cast, but not a single character between them. Chiwetel Ejiofor, Norman Reedus and Aaron Paul play meatheaded criminals, while Casey Affleck, Anthony Mackie and Woody Harrelson play meatheaded cops. Plus, Kate Winslet shows up as a Russian-Jewish mobster, doing the worst accent since Kate Winslet in Steve Jobs. Even for the star of Titanic, this is embarrassing. 

How can anyone invest in the outcome of a film like this? There’s one bunch of arseholes, and then there’s another bunch of aresholes, and some of the arseholes will be killed, and some of them won’t. Who cares? It’s like Sabotage without the fun of watching Arnie try to act. A waste of its talented ensemble, Triple 9 is a triple whammy: generic, gratuitous and boring.