Blood Father
I remember hearing a story about one of Mel Gibson’s parenting tactics. He’d put dummy heads (from film sets) on spikes, and when his daughter’s boyfriends came to pick her up, he’d […]
Category Archives: New Releases
My Scientology Movie
Documentarian and falsetto singer Louis Theroux takes to the big screen with this investigation into the Church of Scientology. We’re reviewing this documentary between us in order to confuse the squirrel-busters. An […]
The Girl on the Train
The year that cinema forgot continues with The Girl on the Train, based on Paula Hawkins’ best-selling novel. A divorced woman (Emily Blunt), drunk and depressed, becomes obsessed with a […]
Don’t Breathe
From director Fede Alvarez and producer Sam Raimi comes new horror film Don’t Breathe, sung in my head to the tune of ‘Don’t Speak’ by No Doubt. Trying to steal a […]
The Magnificent Seven
The latest product of a Hollywood executive’s brainstorming session entitled “What haven’t we remade yet?” is a rerun of classic Western The Magnificent Seven, about a gang of, you guessed […]
Anthropoid
This weekend sees the release of at least two Toby Jones movies. One is a sci-fi film with the decidedly un-sci-fi title Morgan; the other a war film with the […]
Café Society
The problem with having a birthday at the beginning of September is that there are never any films out. My only option was Woody Allen‘s Café Society, which failed to […]
Ben-Hur (2016)
This is a CGI-heavy retelling of the classic tale, in which Ben-Hur (first name Judah) takes on the Roman Empire and his estranged brother Messala (first name Chicken Tikka) to try […]
Nerve
Nerve is a teen techno-thriller from the directors of Paranormal Activity 3 and 4, which I didn’t even realise had directors. Based on Jeanne Ryan’s novel, the film revolves around an app […]
Lights Out
In 2013, David F. Sandberg made a terrifying short film (below) with zero scope for expansion. Enter James Wan. Lights Out opens in a mannequin warehouse, for no reason other than it’s […]
